I’m thinking about starting a business. A business that will help millions of families… Yes, a policing system for stupid, ludicrous life decisions made by family members and friends that turn your life upside down. Having made some nonsensical judgments in my past, I think I am a perfect candidate for evaluating stupid choices made by misguided people. Some examples that my Ludicrous Life Decision Policing System could help with:
-An Uncle that is a father of five, thinking about quitting his job and moving his family to Alaska, and pursuing a love of igloo architecture. I would intervene and find a resolution, like smacking some sense into him. No peaceful resolution here- just tough love.
-A teenage daughter that wants to quit school, get a tattoo of a clown on her neck, and move in with her rodeo clown boyfriend. I would intervene by taking her to a local trailer park and making her live with a family of ten in a four room trailer for a week (if it even takes that long).
-Your newly widowed father who wants to marry someone thirty years his junior, buy a yacht, and spend his remaining years looking for a mermaid colony in Australia. Well, seriously aren’t you just a little curious about mermaids?
I think this would be a booming business! I could tell people to stop being stupid and screwing with your sanity. I see a bright and busy future here; there is one of these people in every family…
The post above was
*tactfully* actually posted January 10, 2014 and I decided to revive it this January. No family members were hurt in the development of this business idea.